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Love, Marriage And Money
By Johnette Duff, Fri Dec 9th
The f-word. Finances. Combining love and money may be thebiggest stumbling block on the path of true love, creating morerifts in relationships than in-laws, drug and alcohol addiction,or infidelity. Financial power struggles challenge even the most solidpartnership. Unfortunately, money too often equates to controlin a relationship. The delicate balance of power between you isdependent on the successful combination of love and money. In the majority of relationships today, both members contributefinancial resources. Despite the strides women have made towardfinancial equality on the job, though, men still have greaterearning power. In general, with more disposable income, meninvest more money and take greater risks than women. Women as awhole are more conservative in their investments because ittakes them longer to earn the money. Money attitudes are alsoinfluenced by age, family upbringing, religion, and eachperson's own unique financial trials and errors.
Everyone has opened a bank account, paid the rent or mortgage,kept the telephone and electricity turned on. When you make thedecision to share your life with someone, though, such mundaneissues suddenly become complicated. Do you keep separate bank accounts or do you put all the moneyin one account? How do you split monthly expenses? Do you eachpay a portion or do you pay bills out of a joint account? Shouldyou be able to sign on your partner's bank account? Did one ofyou bring assets to the relationship that the other uses, suchas a car or a home, for which expenses should be shared? Financial advice for couples over fifty varies significantlydepending on age, economic status and dependents. Everysituation is different, but the following is general advice foreveryone. Many modern couples keep their finances separate, while othersopt to pool all their funds. Making the decision on theday-to-day handling of what was formerly “his” and “her” moneycan be a tough one. There are benefits to keeping separate property funds separateand maintaining certain assets in one name only, which we'llexplain in more detail in the next chapter.
Keeping other moniesseparate may create logistical problems, though, along with adiminished sense of common goals for the future. Combining yourfunds also gives a couple greater borrowing and investmentpower. Determining a financial plan that works might take months; manycouples struggle for years before reaching a balance. Definingand discussing your money styles is the first step, settinggoals is the second. Review your financial picture. Are you both satisfied with yourknowledge and control of “your” money and “our” money? Are youboth knowledgeable about banking, insurance, investments, creditcards? The routine business of a new life together should include thefollowing: Reevaluation of life, health, auto and otherinsurance coverage A change of beneficiary on insurancepolicies and company pension plans Notification tosocial security of your marriage to ensure eligibility for yourspouse's benefits and change of W-4 withholding Anassessment of the impact of remarriage on alimony orpension/retirement benefits from a prior marriage Aconsultation with an accountant to learn the impact your maritalstatus will have on your federal or state income tax obligations In a remarriage, be aware that the income of a newspouse may impact eligibility for financial aid of college-agechildren from a prior marriage. You may need to consult your banker, your employer, yourinsurance agent, your accountant, your attorney or otherprofessionals to accomplish these tasks. Your goal in tying the fiscal knot is to protect your spousalrights and save money. Begin your research before the weddingand make sure you follow through. Loveandthelaw.com should be your first stop - it’s an easy andinexpensive way to stay informed. About the author:Johnette Duff is the author of The Spousal Equivalent Handbook:a legal and financial guide to living together, The MarriageHandbook: a legal and financial guide to your spousal rights,and Love After 50: a legal and financial guide. Nationally, shehas appeared on Today, Good Morning America, CBS This Morningand in various publications promoting information on love andthe law. Ms. Duff has recently opened a web site titled, loveand the law.
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